The Gospel According To Boyce: February 2008

Thursday, February 14, 2008

How About a Little "Clemensy"??

Roger Clemens is guilty as hell.

For those of you who may have an inkling into the world of baseball, Roger Clemens is one of the greatest pitchers ever to grace the game. His power, speed and dominance on the mound is second, in my mind, only to the great Nolan Ryan. He has won 7 Cy Young Awards as the best pitcher in the league over a season...2 more than any pitcher in the history of the league. He struck out a major league record 20 batters in one game in 1986 and 1996. He dominated well into his 40's, and it is now being publicly unraveled that this prolonged dominance may have been attributed to the usage of steroids and/or Human Growth Hormone. And by the looks of everything that has transpired so far, he appears guilty as hell. His once adamant, confident, and defiant denial of any wrong doing has now transgressed into an "Oh shit I'm screwed" denial. Whomever his lawyer was...he's an inept douche bag.

"Just deny everything Roger...they can't prove anything!! We'll play the "Nuh uh...DID NOT!!" card!! It's foolproof, Rog, FOOLPROOF!!!"

He's probably paying hundreds of thousands of dollars to get that delusional legal advice. What a shame...it's Roger Clemens dammit!! Why Roger??

I guess when your best friend rats you out in front of the United States Congress, not much is going to save you from imminent prosecution. Not so much for the fact that you used performance enhancing drugs, but the fact that you have now LIED to Congress about it. That's called PERJURY Holmes!

In what could very well have been a simple, "Tsk, tsk...shame of you Roger Clemens. Bad boy!!" (slap on the wrist and a tarnished reputation). End of Story, life goes on. But instead you have chosen to live out the remainder of your days with a tarnished reputation and career, and a big fat FELONY conviction on your record. Good thing you had a successful career!! Hang on to that cash, because without it you're now screwed!!

But why Roger? It's more than obvious that a relatively high percentage of Major League baseball players use performance enhancing drugs. In a league with so many people fighting for a dream, making the smallest of wages playing 7+ years in the minor leagues in no name towns, they will do anything to maintain that competitive edge. You can go from making $35,000 a year to $2,000,000 if you have a solid year in the majors. The risk is very much worth the potential reward. And for those superstars who age and decline in performance, the threat of the spotlight and glory vanishing is a very difficult and painful thought to bear. So any way you can prolong your career and maintain your youthful dominance, you'll do it. The fire never dies, but the strength of the arm will undoubtedly fade before you're ready for it.

Barry Bonds, the over publicized "guilty as hell" steroid user, went through what Clemens is now going through. Bonds was vilified and his All-Time Home Run Record...the most coveted record in all of baseball...tarnished everything the record and the game stood for. The purity that we all chose to believe was tainted. Even though it was as pure as the most veteran of whores. Bond being guilty as OJ is America's most wide-spread stance on the subject. Many people believe it's because he's black. I say it's because he's an asshole. But calling him an asshole isn't entirely fair. I will readily admit, that the guy is certainly an arrogant prick as well. And that has a large part to play in his public crucifixion by the media and the general public. Every away stadium he plays in, he is faced with a chorus of BOO's so intense, you'd think Bin Laden was playing shortstop. When you're an overall dick to everyone you encounter, not having an ounce of respect for anyone, Karma plays some twisted games with you. Welcome to the show Roid Boy!!

There's something about Barry that elicits an inherent desire in Americans to loathe him and wish him guilt and scrutiny. Probably because he's black. Let's be serious, this is America. Although he DID break the coveted record which was set by another black man, so I don't see what the big deal is, it's not like he was taking it from a WHITE guy. Why are you so mad America? There's nothing to fear..."They" are not "taking over".

Yet...bwah-ha-ha-ha!!!

Roger Clemens is the essence of the game. He has been one of the most prolific players in the history of the game. He is a pitcher you one day tell your grandkids about. The legend of your time. Like the stories of Sandy Koufax and Warren Spahn your father or grandfather told, so you shall tell of Roger Clemens. He's someone you were glad to have seen pitch in the prime of your passion for sports. He was the one who comes around once in a generation. So why? Out of all the scrubs and goons you could have made an example of, you nail one of the greatest ever to play after he's essentially done playing. Where is the logic?

Honestly, I don't care who uses steroids. I don't want to know. If it means you knock 90 home runs out of the park in a season, so be it. It's a new era, a new evolution of the game. The game isn't completely the same as it was when our grandfather watched Babe Ruth and his fat drunken ass round the bases with the speed and grace of a gazelle in the clutches of death amongst a pride of starving lions. Slow as a slug on a fly trap he was. (OK I made that one up) The game evolves every generation, and this is our evolution. Juiced beasts with superhuman strength, speed, and agility. Entertain me gentlemen...even if it's at the expense of your shrinking balls!!

With the country now immersed in a recession, and a Presidential Race comprised of a group of circus clowns on both sides of the ticket, who all show the distinct capacity to be able to single-handedly continue the downward spiral caused by George W. Buffoon...should this government not have FAR MORE important business to conduct? For the love of God, we're entering a trying and critical moment in the history of this Great Nation. Screw baseball you star struck congressional swine!! Balance this budget, solve the housing crisis, fix SOMETHING of worth and significance!! The American tax payers are not paying your salary to nail sports stars who cheat. How about a little Perspective and priority shifting Washington!!

Who would have thought we'd see the day where sports, politics, and media glamorization would merge into one over-dramatized story.

Really America? REALLY???

How can you not trust this face??

posted by Boyce 2:18 AM 1 comments

1 Comments:

At June 7, 2013 at 6:29 PM, Anonymous said…

Hey are using Wordpress for your blog platform? I'm new to the blog world but I'm trying to get started and create my
own. Do you need any coding knowledge to make your own blog?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Here is my site; book auf ra kostenlos spielen (http://wwsdemo.fourptzero.com)

Post a Comment

<< HOME

So Long PatriNOTS!!

Justice has been served!! In what was by far the greatest Superbowl ever played...or at least witnessed in my lifetime...a team of cocky, arrogant, overconfident ass mongers choked in a manner and fashion that was as magnificent as their regular season. But as we all know, the most prolific of regular seasons, no matter how insanely dominant, don't mean shit if you're sent packing with anything less than a world title. I admittedly watched every televised game these Patsies played as I marveled at the sheer dominance they displayed. In what was obviously the most dominant regular season by a team in football history, and being the sports fanatic I am, I was drawn to the spectacle and the manner in which they toyed with their opponents like they were peewee flag football teams. To avoid witnessing what was easily the most dominant regular season on record would be foolish as a fan of the game. But throughout this time I in no way wavered from my detesting of this team what they represented. Much like a wicked car wreck, you never want to see them happen, but you can't help but watch.

And in their historic success, their utter failure and collapse made it so much sweeter. Those who watched at my house cheered and roared as if it were our own teams hoisting the Lombardi trophy. And we were confident 49 other states in this fine country of ours were doing the same. And in a beautiful display of karmic justice, this team of crooked cheaters got what they deserved. And as the further investigation into the history of cheating throughout this now questionable "dynasty", the truth behind their supposed success will be unveiled. Amen!!

While few can question the dominance of this team over the last 8 years, no amount of "Well at least our team made it!!" will suffice as a legitimate retort. Any city who plans a celebration parade with the arrogant knowledge that their team can't lose is a town full of chumps. And chumps they shall remain until the 2008 season commences...and maybe longer. Yes, definitely longer...history is forever. And this choke was as historic as it gets.

posted by Boyce 2:07 AM 0 comments

0 Comments: