I'm driving through the grocery store parking lot this evening when a group of Spanish patrons hit the crosswalk at the store exit which I have stopped at. I stopped enough in advance that I could have easily proceeded as the men had yet to reach the crosswalk. Being the nice lad I am (at least on this occasion), I paused for a few seconds and gave them the courtesy wave, allowing them to pass.

Now I've been on the opposing end of this situation numerous times. You know, when you encounter the decent man or woman as you're exiting the store. They wave you across saying "Go ahead my friend, after you." You give the obligatory smile, wave and/or head nod; and to return the courtesy you briskly walk across the way, not wanting to hold them up anymore than they already have been. You essentially reciprocate their generosity. This all seems reasonable enough, wouldn't you say? Or perhaps this is simply my twisted and sadistic view on common courtesy. But I'd say not so much. And I'd feel damn good about it.

There are fewer and fewer instances in the on-goings of humanity where we have the opportunity to display a bit of courtesy to our fellow man. Simple courtesies such as the classic holding the door open for someone, the standard for all good deeds in our society. Or perhaps you pick something up for someone who has just dropped something at your feet.

(*Editor's Note: If you find yourself in this particular situation and you are a woman...you fell for it, enjoy the show fellas!)

Or maybe you allow someone to cut in line ahead of you at the store when you see that they only have a few items compared to your very full load. Sure, just seconds ago you were the subject of their inner monologue about "Fat Bastards and Their Impact on the American Gross Domestic Product and the Global Economic Infrastructure". With their incessant over-consumption of imported and domestic food goods its bound to have an impact!

Maybe it's diving in front of a speeding bus to thwart the attempts of a suicidal man with a painful, agonizing terminal illness. Then again you will have probably done him more harm than good saving him from the death he so desperately wants in order to end his suffering and misery. He's bound to resent you for your actions. Strike that one.

It's these moments that, while seemingly minute and meaningless on a grand scale, show that in spite of the disconnect in the personal relationships of one another, we do possess the decency somewhere deep within, to help one another out.

Perhaps I'm just in a short-tempered mood today, or I've experienced this situation to the point where I need to vent before I blow up and club a seal. Whatever it is I need to get it off my chest, and the time is now.

So as this group approaches the crosswalk and makes eye contact with me, they assume that they are yielding to me as I have reached the stop sign first and I am about to proceed through the crosswalk. Unexpectedly, I give them the courtesy wave essentially saying, "Please...after you." These sons of bitches take my wave, look down without even acknowledging my nice gesture and then to top it off with a little "fuck you" cherry, they take their sweet ass fucking time (30 seconds) to stroll across the 20' crosswalk as they're on a nice Sunday stroll in the park with their paraplegic grandmother. It took everything in my power not to stomp that gas pedal down and send their greasy, slow ass dragging, I-don't-give-a-rats-ass-about-anyone-but-my-fat-ass-fucking-self, clear across the parking lot into the window of a nearby McDonalds that they would inevitably end up at anyway to feed their fat fucking faces.

Here's a tip assholes...IF SOMEONE HAS THE DECENCY TO LET YOU PASS, ACKNOWLEDGE IT!!! I'm not looking for a giant wave, a shit-eating grin, or even a courtesy blowjob. Give me a little nod, a wink, a slight grin, a back hand spring to a round off back tuck & summersault ending in a scissor split. Something that says, "Hey, thanks Pal." Don't turn your head like you had the right of way to begin with and own the fucking ground you walk on, you degenerate slime. It's you bastards who are contributing to the rapidly increasing decline of humanity.

You know these are the same notorious jackasses who don't give you the courtesy wave then you let them merge into traffic in front of you, change lanes, or pull out of a parking lot. You stop in your tracks or slow down to make their commute a little easier and they squeeze on in as if to say, "That's right, you'd better let me in."

FUCK YOU. And while you're at it, fuck your mother too.

What the hell has happened to us? Perhaps I was raised with the iron fist of manners, but not only are small gestures of courtesy the right thing to do, they actually make you feel pretty good. But the world has become so preoccupied with SELF that we mind as well be living in individual bubbles. And that's what we've ultimately become...bubbles. Bubbles that don't break, bend or give. Bubbles that are tinted black to aid in achieving greater ignorance to the world around us. We have our cell phones, PDA's, laptops, and iPods to keep tabs on the world outside these bubbles. God forbid we acknowledge those around us. People who live, breathe, feel and exist just like you - just like everyone. People who have so much in common with one another that we somehow become invisible to one another.

Perhaps we are all merely pages in a never ending book. No one page can be distinguished from one another. The words and stories on them differ, but the ultimate makeup, structure and substance are the same. When you look at the pages from beginning to end, they are seemingly identical. After a while they all integrate...losing their significance, meaning, and purpose. We are all but wandering pages of a book that we are all a part of, but because we do not bind we are meaningless. But together we create a story, a composition of unity and truth that gives us purpose and meaning. All we have to do is recognize it.

Where do we go from here? It doesn't take a scientist to see the path we have paved and the direction we're headed. It's a one way tunnel...and it's deep...and dank, just down right dank.

Is all hope lost? I will to continue to do my part as best I can and as patience will allow. I'll hold the door, say hi to a passing stranger, not walk to the other side of the street when a black guy is in my path, let the non-waving jackass into my lane, whatever presents itself (when I'm in the mood). And while I'll desperately want to give them the finger and shove the front end of my car deep within recesses their selfish assholes, I will refrain...however reluctantly and with immense restraint.

But one day...and hopefully that day will never come...I may find restraint to be a joke and an impossibility. And if you are the sorry son of a bitch who doesn't heed the advice I've just clearly laid out? If you feel an uncomfortable thrusting pressure in your colon, followed by a high pitched honk. That's me. And the front end of my car is burrowed in your ass.

Enjoy the ride asshole.